All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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