...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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