It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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