You really coming over, don't trick.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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