True but thats because hes a fetus.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
