My brain says no but my pants say off.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
