Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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