areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
