i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
