OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
