so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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