I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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