Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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