office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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