His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
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