HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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