Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
