i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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