Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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