Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
