I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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