He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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