Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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