So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
