I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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