i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
