Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
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