I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
