I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
did you just send me my own nude
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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