5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
last night I used snow as a chaser
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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