Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
