I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
