glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
You may now shotgun with the bride
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
