Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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