Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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