He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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