Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
