Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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