Have you finally orgasmed yet?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
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