do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Randomize
