She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
