why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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