doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
