Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
