piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize