What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
