i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
