just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I just want to make out with him forever
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
