The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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