I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
