Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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