im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
